“I am Jack’s complete lack of surprise.”

By Kurt Hunzeker (with some copy points provided by the movie Fight Club)

When a sports nickname and accompanying logo slick are unveiled, and when you first see it, you know “this will change everything we know about sports branding,” it should come as no surprise that it was all a dream.

But it wasn’t.

And thus begins the tale of the split personality now known as the New Hampshire Fisher Cats (aka Brad Pitt’s Tyler Durden), but deep down inside, is still really the New Hampshire Primaries (aka Edward Norton’s unnamed schizophrenic insurance adjuster.)

“I am Jack’s broken heart.”

Unlike some analysts and writers who have touched on this subject, I cannot believe the Primaries/Fisher Cats abandoned the Primaries’ moniker and slick logo set after only three days. When you think of New Hampshire, what’s the first thing that comes to mind? Primaries. New Hampshire is best known as the first state to kick off the presidential primary season.

Likewise, what is a fisher cat? According to Dictionary.com, it is “large dark brown North American arboreal carnivorous mammal.” Wow, that really gets me going.

In a recent conversation with a high-ranking member of the Primaries/Fisher Cats’ front office, he said that the team(s) still orders caps every year emblazoned with the “Uncle Sam” logo which debuted when the former New Haven Ravens unveiled its first name for its new home in Manchester.

If the team(s) continually has to re-stock its shelves with this specific Primaries’ cap design, then that should tell you something.

“Pretend you're me, make a managerial decision: you find this, what would you do?”
“Well, I gotta tell you: I'd be very, very careful who you talk to about that, because the person who wrote that... is dangerous.”

So how did the Primaries’ name unravel so fast? Thank the vocal minority (otherwise known as New Hampshire’s sparse Republican lobby) who immediately called up TV stations, newspapers and anyone with a camera, pen or tape recorder and began pooh-poohing the name because “it’s not an animal” (re: New Hampshire Public Radio, November 2003).

As with any new team and/or logo, it takes time for the team to implement the brand into the community. Imagine the possibilities: lawn signs proclaiming allegiance for the new STATE-WIDE team (not just Manchester); team media guides replicating the look and design of campaign pamphlets; and Super Tuesday specials every home Tuesday night game, just to name a few ideas.

But what the naysayers never even considered because it had yet to be unveiled might have cost the team(s) enormous amounts of merchandising revenue…

“I felt like destroying something beautiful.”

Is that what the people of Manchester were saying to themselves when they essentially knifed the Primaries’ name and identity in the back? Seriously, do you think the team regrets not unveiling the alternate caps featuring both mascots of the political party landscape? Would that have changed the public’s perception of the team(s)?

These logos would have not only sold well in Manchester, and not just in all of New Hampshire, or even the political epicenter that is Washington, DC…but EVERYWHERE. Red Staters in Georgia, Missouri and Texas would have purchased the red-capped Republican Elephant, and Blued New Yorkers, Michiganites and Californians would have clamored to order the blue-topped Democrat Donkey. In cap sales alone, the Primaries would have sold tens of thousands of caps.

And just imagine what would happen during big election years…you can hear the cash register ringing in the background….

“I am Jack's smirking revenge.”

So is the Primaries’ name officially dead. Everyone close to the team says quite the contrary. With 2006 a key mid-term election cycle, plan on seeing the Uncle Sam caps crop up more frequently, and not just on the team(s)’ online store. The red-elephant and blue-donkey lids could also escape its exile and show up on retail racks in the coming months.

I can only hope that the team(s)’ top-level brass can see the value in the brand they so quickly buried, and all because of a very vocal, very small minority of talking heads. An election should be in the offing, and We The People should have a say in who wins that Primary.

EDITOR'S NOTE: If you hadn't guessed already, the Primaries' design was developed by Dan Simon of Studio Simon.